Contagious Love

by Dana Ullman, M.P.H.

"Love cures people -- both the one who gives it 
and the one who receives it." 
                                   - Karl Menninger, M.D.

Love begets love, hate begets hate, and beget begets beget.

Everything is contagious -- not just germs, but good vibes and bad vibes, too. Simply witness what happens when a person begins laughing hysterically, and watch how this action gets others to laugh or at least smile. Also witness what happens when someone is expressing hatred for another, and notice how those in the vicinity tighten their bodies, develop a defensive posture, and maybe clutch another's hand.

Loving and hating are not just emotional states -- both have direct physical effects on the body. Just as fear creates the fight-or-flight reaction, feelings of hate create an armoring of the body that tenses the musculature, raises blood pressure, shortens and speeds respiration, and creates a clear psychological distance between people. 

Feelings of love, in contrast, reduce tension, decrease blood pressure, lengthen and slow breathing, and blur the distinction between one person and another. Not only does hate hurt others, it hurts the person feeling it, while love benefits both the giver and receiver.

Although most people do not know how to tell their body to heal itself, they do know how to love, and this can set the wheels of healing in motion. As Yale surgeon Bernie Siegel likes to remind people, "If I told patients to raise their blood levels of immune globulins or killer T-cells, no one would know how. But if I can teach them to love themselves and others fully, the same changes happen automatically. The truth is: Love heals."

Love can heal physical, emotional, and spiritual pain. Love of self and love from or for others can soothe physical pain, enrich emotional life, and help connect one person with another. Although love has powerful side effects, they are all positive side effects. And when love doesn't heal completely, at least it makes the pain a lot easier to handle.

Learning to love is, however, a lot more difficult than it seems, especially for people who haven't received much love themselves. It is also problematic for those who have received what was called love, but it tended to smother more than soothe them. Perhaps the best place to start is by learning to love yourself. 

By being loving, a person makes him or herself more lovable. Through giving, a person receives. By being joyful, a person shares JOY with others. It seems so obvious, yet it is so elusive to too many people.

"As you sow, so shall you reap" is an old saying that reminds us that what is put into something is what is received from it. The hands that give away flowers retain the fragrance of the gift.

Bad vibes can be just as contagious as good ones. The worst thing that an S.O.B. can do is turn you into an S.O.B. Anger, fear, and hate are all contagious, too, although each of us can learn to be more resistant to these "infections". 

By expressing compassion, anger is dissipated. By seeking to understand the unknown, fear disappears. By loving, hate evaporates.

The price one pays for hating others is loving oneself less. Even worse, the body feels this emotion and expresses it as pain and disease.

Perhaps one day soon, more doctors will prescribe love for their patients. It may not cure them all, but it is a good place to start.

This article was excerpted from

"The Steps to Healing - Wisdom from the Sages,  the Rosemarys,
and the Times" by Dana Ullman, MPH
Info/Order this book.

About The Author

Dana Ullman M.P.H., has authored six books on homeopathic and natural medicine, including The Consumer's Guide to Homeopathy, Homeopathy for Children and Infants,  and Homeopathy A-Z. He serves on advisory boards of alternate medicine institutes at Harvard and Columbia schools of medicine, and has also co-taught a course in homeopathic medicine at the University of California at San Francisco School of Medicine. This article was excerpted with permission from his book "The Steps to Healing", ©1999, published by Hay House Inc. www.hayhouse.com 

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