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It's Now or Never
by Ric Giardina
Living is a thing you do now or never — which do you?
-- PIEI HEIN
It
is probable that this book (Become
A Life Balance Master) actually is the set of directions you have been
looking for that will allow you to design the life you want to live; indeed, it
is intended to be that. It is also possible that this program may not be ideal
for you, although I am a firm believer in kismet — if you have this book in your
hands, it's there for a reason.
But be forewarned: If you intend to get any value from this book, it is not
to be taken lightly — nor is it for the fainthearted. What you do with this book
and, hence, whether it helps you to change your life for the better or whether
it does nothing at all is entirely up to you.
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In any event, before you start on this journey, you need to know the
following: To get any benefit from this book will require you to embrace and to
commit and continuously recommit to exhibiting a combination of certain personal
characteristics. These characteristics include attention, intention, intuition,
creativity, articulation, action, discipline, integrity, and patience.
Attention , because if you have any hope of making changes to the way
you are living your life — some people like to say "doing life" — then you will
have to start taking a close look at what you are actually doing at the present
time. This will require a new level of mindfulness about your thought processes,
your choices and decisions, and your actions and activities. Frankly,
maintaining that level of awareness can seem forced in the best of circumstances
and is likely to make you uncomfortable at times.
Intention , because at every stage of this journey it will be necessary
for you to be clear about the direction into which you want to move next. If you
don't know where you are going, how will you know when or if you have gotten
there? Intention is like keeping your eye on the ball. It is also like a welcome
fire in your soul that you can stoke from time to time to get you over the rough
spots.
Intuition , because there will be times when things will look like they
are moving in the right direction, but something inside you may be trying to
tell you that something is off. You will need to learn to listen to those little
messages — those suggestions, inklings, pictures, and nudges from your
subconscious. Frequently, your subconscious mind knows more about what is going
on in your "real" world than your conscious mind does. If you fail to heed your
intuition, you will end up traveling down too many dark alleys and dead ends in
your quest to make your life one of balance.
Creativity , because this journey will require you to look at your life
in different ways and to come up with alternative solutions to the issues and
problems you have been attempting to solve by making the same choices over and
over and expecting different results. Those choices haven't worked to give you
what you truly want in the past, and they will not work to provide you with your
heart's desire for the future. The path to your balanced future begins with you
reaching deep into your creative self for new approaches and ways of being that
will surprise you in terms of their depth, their appropriateness, and the
results that they bring.
Articulation , because as you begin to change the world around you
beginning with your views of your self, your life activities, and your
responsibilities, it will become necessary for you to explain to those who are
in your circle of family, friends, and business associates — and most of all
those who rely on you — that you are undertaking to change the way you are
living your life. You need to do this for two reasons: First, because it is
unfair to surprise people with unexpected behaviors. If you have been living
life a particular way and then suddenly change your behavior without giving
notice of your intentions to the people in your life, they may respond badly.
Second, because you will want to garner support for your new way of living, and
you can only get that by explaining what you are doing and why.
Action , because planning to do something is not the same thing as
doing it. Our dreams become realities only to the extent that we actually start
doing something about making then happen. For you to succeed on this journey,
you will need to be action-oriented in a very deliberate and mindful way.
Discipline , because taking mindful action one or two times is not
enough any more than running a mile or two would prepare you for a marathon. To
change what you are doing consistently for the long haul, the new actions that
you do only deliberately and mindfully at first will need to become your
unconscious default actions — your new habits. To accomplish this, it will be
necessary for you to be disciplined in both constancy and repetition.
Integrity , because you will undermine your entire program if you fudge
your self-assessment and your progress and if you are anything other than
ruthlessly honest with yourself. For many people, this is the hardest
characteristic to embrace. After all, most people get off balance because they
either haven't been paying attention to the consequences of their behaviors,
choices, and actions or because, even if they do begin to recognize subliminal
stirrings that things aren't right, they fool themselves into thinking that
everything will work itself out without the need to make any changes. This is
yet one more example of our human tendency to do the same thing over and over
with the ridiculous expectation that at some point we will get a different
result.
Patience , finally, because whatever the state of your life and your
Life Balance equation at this point, you have arrived here through the making of
choices and the taking of actions over a lengthy period of time — perhaps your
entire life. You will not be able to suddenly shift direction in the blink of an
eye and start down a direct course to your heart's desire. As noted above, it
will take disciplined repetition of mindful choices as well as actions taken in
full awareness of their consequences over a period of time to change what have
effectively become your habits. There will be times that you succeed and times
that you do not. You will need to practice patience in good measure — with the
process, with other people in your life, and most importantly, with yourself —
as day by day you make different choices, try alternative approaches, monitor
your progress, and then reclaim your chosen path when you have discovered you
have somehow strayed from it.
This
article was excerpted from Become A Life Balance Master, ©2003, by Ric
Giardina.
Reprinted with permission of the publisher, Beyond Words Publishing, Inc.
www.beyondword.com
Info/Order this book.
About the Author
 RIC
GIARDINA is the founder and president of The Spirit Employed Company, a
management consulting and training firm that offers keynote addresses and other
programs on authenticity, balance, community, and discipline. Ric is the author
of
Your Authentic Self: Be Yourself at Work and a book of poetry called
Threads of Gold. He lives in Los Gatos, California, with his wife and
daughter.
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