Happy
Mothers' Day
to All
by Marie T. Russell
I
remember reading years ago, about someone who used to
send their mother flowers on their birthday... What's so
special about that you might say. You've also sent your
mother flowers on her birthday... but have you sent her
flowers on your birthday... to thank her for giving you
life?
We have
set aside one day a year to honor mothers... just like
we set aside a day for love (Valentine's Day), another
day for fathers, another day for grandparents, etc. So
what happens on the other days? Is the love expressed
only on that one day?
Perhaps
we need to look at the concept of expressing gratitude,
appreciation, and love and take it away from those
"special" days and those "special"
persons, and apply it to each and every day, and even
more important, to each and every one of us.
Many of
us no longer have their mother in the physical form.
Others are caring for their mother in her old age.
Others are sitting by their mother's deathbed. And
others still are fortunate enough to still have the
occasion to get to know their mother, not just as
"mom", but as a unique human being... someone
that perhaps we have taken for granted...
Each
"mother" is a human being in her own right...
not just "our mom". Have we taken the time to
get to really know her and to find out what her dreams
were when she was younger... what she would really have
like to do with her life? Have we shared with her from
the truth of who we are, our dreams, our hopes, our
fears? Or have we just kept the "traditional"
roles, going home on holidays because, well, because you
"have" to.
Do we
see motherhood as something that is the domain of just
the mothers in the world? If you haven't given birth (or
adopted) a child, then you're not a mother? I disagree.
A mother resides in each and every one of us, whether or
not we have children. While not every one has given
birth to a child, we all, male and female, are in a
sense mothering someone, or something... perhaps we have
helped "mother" a talent in someone else, or
perhaps we are learning to "mother" or nurture
ourselves or the people we love.
Mothering
is not a physical act. Giving birth is, but mothering is
a whole other thing. It can be done by men, as well as
women. It can be done by people who are not physically
related. Mothering is an art. It is the expression of
unconditional love, or giving of self for the best of
the other. It is putting the other one's needs before
ours.
In some
cases, this can reek of martyrdom and co-dependency.
Yet, when done in the spirit of Love (with a capital L)
and in the spirit of Divine Guidance, then mothering is
something that the whole world needs more of.
Think of
it... If we considered the homeless, the deprived, the
abandoned, the unloved as part of our close family, and
shared some mothering (not smothering) energy with them,
our world would be a better place.
Perhaps
this mothers' day, we might reflect on how we can be a
better mother to the planet and to all its inhabitants,
human or not. Whether that means the tough kids down the
block, the loud neighbor next door, the husband or
boyfriend you're angry with, the boss that's a pain, the
co-worker who whines constantly... Yes, let's look on
how we can express loving and nurturing energy towards
those people.
Mothers'
Day is simply a reminder... to share love with our
mother every day... to share love with others on a daily
basis as well... to practice unconditional love with
those who test our patience the most... (isn't that what
mothers do?)
I read
recently that mothers who had a child on death row, or
in prison, still loved their child... still felt that
the child was lovable even though they had committed an
unlovable act. These mothers still found love in their
heart for their child who had committed acts of murder,
rape, etc.
Perhaps
that's what we need to learn on mothers' day... That
even if someone has committed an act, which in our eyes
is unforgivable, that the person is still a person who
deserves support and assistance... that the person who
commits this heinous crime or terrible deed (in our
eyes), is still a child of God, is still a being going
through life with their life lessons, with their
challenges, with their goals... That they still are, in
their own way, on the path to learning to become a
"better" person...
Just
like the child who is learning to walk and stumbles and
falls, these persons have stumbled and fallen... But
just like the mother who loves the child anyway, even if
he is clumsy, even if he does things that are maddening,
we still need to look for the best in each person... to
learn to love them even though we do not love their
behavior... to learn to see past the behavior and see a
being on their path, learning what they need to learn,
experiencing what they need to experience, to take them
to the next step...
After
all, all of us, whether we are mothers, children, or
adults, are spiritual beings having a human
experience... Let's help each other remember that...
regardless of appearances.
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