Are
You Waiting
for Something?
by
Marie T. Russell
I
remember as a child, during the long and very cold
winters up North, standing at the window for what, in
retrospect, seems like hours. I would stand there with
my recurring thought being, "It's so boring here!"
I felt sorry for myself and spent my time at the window
waiting for something to happen, waiting for some magic
that would suddenly give me a life that was full of
excitement and fun.
This
pattern I have seen repeated both in myself and in
others around me. Maybe we should call it the sleeping
beauty/frog prince complex. It consists of waiting for
something or someone to deliver us from whatever
situation we have gotten ourselves into. We even pray
"deliver us from evil"... again expecting to
be rescued from whatever mess we may have gotten
ourselves into.
Look at
your life and see how this behavior applies to you as
well. Do you find yourself bemoaning your present
situation (job, relationship, living situation, etc.)
without doing anything about it? Are you waiting for
your fairy god-mother to deliver you? or possibly for
God (or a knight) to come charging in on a white steed?
When I
look back at the child that I was, I see that my problem
was not the cold weather... it was my attitude towards
it. Rather than find creative ways to spend the time, I
spent that time complaining about something I could not
change. Rather than do something that would help me
enjoy the cold days, I spent them as if I was helpless
to create a better day for myself.
It seems
that we humans have a tendency to look around ourselves
and lay the responsibility for the occurrences in our
lives on someone else. Rather than take responsibility
for things not being quite the way we want them, it
seems easier to look around and find scapegoats. This
usually tends to be people close to us: co-workers,
husband/wife, girlfriend/boyfriend, neighbors, our
family, etc.
If we
have problems at home or at work, it's the other
person's fault. We easily say that it's because of
the other person's behavior (or the weather) that we
are unhappy. Sometimes we even look further to lay
blame. We look into our past and find fault with our
upbringing, previous relationships, religion, etc. It's
all THEIR fault!
The
problem with that outlook is that if your situation is
someone else's fault then the solution must also be in
their hands. Whereas, if you take responsibility for
creating your own "stuff" then at least you have the
option of changing it. Of course, with a metaphysical
perspective, we know that we are the ones responsible...
no one else. Yet somehow, when we get caught up in the
nitty-gritty of our existence, we sometimes fail to
remember.
At those
times, we sometimes fall back on blame. If we have a
problem with others, it's because they are not
in tune... not because we lack understanding,
patience, and compassion. If we get treated harshly in
the world, it's because 'those other people'
are bitchy and negative... not us. If we get into
an accident or collision (whether physical or
emotional), it's not us who's at fault...of course
not! It's THEM!
When we
get caught up in our stuff, we overlook all our
metaphysical lessons and conveniently forget that we
create our own reality. Do we do this because we know
that if we admit that we are responsible, we'll have
to look at our life and see what changes we need to make
in our thoughts, in our attitudes, in our expectations,
in our actions? There is no one out there to blame! We
are the ones that need to stand up and say "I did it!
I created this! I'm responsible!"
Once you
admit that you are the one responsible for creating the
mess, then and only then, can you change it. How can you
change something if you have nothing to do with it?
Admit it! You are the only one who can change your own
life. Great! Now you can do something about it.
Start by
looking at what you are expecting to happen in your
life. Not what you want, not what you would love, but
what you expect. That is what really counts. If you are
asking to win a million dollars, you must believe that
you will get it. You can be asking for world peace, but
unless you really expect it to happen you are not giving
peace a chance.
Whatever
it is that you are asking for in your life, whether it
is a material possession or world peace, unless you
expect it to manifest, you are barking up the wrong
tree.
It's
amazing what that little voice inside, the doubting
Thomas, can prevent you from having. Part of you
believes all the metaphysical principles. You dutifully
repeat your affirmations. You strive to think positively
and to eliminate the negative thoughts. You visualize
your dreams coming true, yet if somewhere inside you
there is a part of you that does not really expect it,
then you've cheated yourself out of success.
We
really need to be the guardians of our thoughts and
subconscious beliefs. We need to take a stand and say,
"I'm the boss of my life. I decide what goes on
here!" And then, be constantly on the alert for any
undermining responses that may be coming from the
subconscious or conscious mind. The beliefs that we have
made our own are many. The programs we accepted are
numerous. Yet, we are in charge of our body and mind. We
need to be clear about what we choose to have and what
we accept and expect in our life.
We all
have a creative aspect of ourselves which resides within
and expresses itself as a quiet voice. Maybe if we weren't
so busy complaining and blaming, we would hear what that
voice has to say. It has millions of fun, creative
solutions to whatever ails you. Listen in!
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