Once upon a time many thousands of years ago, the Devil Himself was sitting in his boiling hot corporate headquarters in Hell, looking at his mission statement. It read:

"To make as many people as possible
as unhappy as possible
for as long as possible."

The Devil was actually a bit depressed because he felt that it really wasn't going so well for the Devil & Co.'s mission at the moment. Despite his persistent efforts, people all around the world were generally very happy and satisfied. People were just loafing around loving themselves and each other and feeling really quite good about everything.

The Evil Plan: How to Make People Miserable

So the Devil knew he had to do something drastic He would have to come up with something that would really kick ass and make people feel dreadfully unhappy and desperate.

And that was when he got the most brilliant idea! An idea that would — without a shadow of a doubt — really make his mission and vision of making as many people as possible as unhappy as possible for as long as possible — a reality. And the idea was...

RELATIONSHIPS!

Yes! Of course, that was it! The Devil could already see it. One big lie — or a series of lies — that were so huge and convincing that they would make people desperately unhappy right from childhood...

The Devil started frantically writing his plan down:

The Devil's Lie No. 1 about Relationships

The love that I seek is outside of me.

This is brilliant, just brilliant thought the Devil as he hopped up and down enthusiastically on his flaming red throne. If I can just get enough people to believe that the love they seek is outside themselves... it will be truly awesome.

Brilliant. Now that the basic concept was in place, it was time to add a little more pain... he, he, he.

The Devil's Lie No. 2 about Relationships

The love that I seek is dependent on another person.

This is good, really, really good thought the Devil, surprised by his own brilliance. I'm really something... yes I really am! Amazing...

And here's another one...!

The Devil's Lie No. 3 about Relationships

I can only experience the love that I seek with one special person.

Even more brilliant! He could already see the Devil & Co.'s worldwide advertising campaign supported by Internet banners in every language proclaiming things like "The One and Only", "Soul Mates", "The Love of Your Life". The Devil could already feel the confusion, the overwhelming longing, the terrible misery and loneliness all the way down to his fifteen big toes. Millions and millions of people all around the world who would actually believe that they could only experience the love they seek with one special person — without ever quite knowing who this one special person was!

And if one was actually lucky enough to find this person; there was no guarantee that this person would love you back. And no guarantee that he or she wasn't already in another relationship. Yes it was brilliant! Just brilliant.

If the Devil could get people to believe this, it would be the end of all that nauseating, touchy-feely lovey-dovey stuff that was flourishing on earth at the moment. It would be the end of all those happy people who just went around loving everything and everyone...

And last but not least...

The Devil's Lie No. 4 about Relationships

It's only true love if the relationship lasts forever.

With this lie, the Devil could be sure that people would stay unhappy no matter what. If they weren't in a relationship, they'd be unhappy because they'd believe that the love that they seek was outside of themselves and dependent on another person. And if they were in a relationship where the partners drifted apart, well this devilish lie — (that it's only true love if the relationship lasts forever) — would keep them in the relationship no matter what they really felt. And the few who actually would be brave enough to separate would always look back at the relationship and feel it was one big failure.

Hmmmm....The Devil was aware that this last lie was pretty far out and that it would be pretty difficult to get people to believe it. So he figured he'd add a little extra lie to back this one up. He decided he'd spread the word that it was God Himself — the Top Dog — who proclaimed this lie to be the God's honest Truth. The Devil would make sure that all religions in the world taught that a relationship was only genuine and real if the partners took a solemn oath that they would love each other and stay together forever — no matter what!

Ha ha ha — am I brilliant or what? The Devil just couldn't stop slapping his thighs with pure devilish joy.

The Action Plan: Selling a Colossal Pack of Lies to Humanity

Okay — so far so good. Now it was time for action — and not just a little action. No, no, no. The Devil knew that if he was going to sell such a colossal pack of lies to humanity, he'd really have to roll out the most massive brainwashing campaign the world had ever seen. So he called in all his sales and marketing people and all his branding departments and they all worked day and night developing a campaign that would make even the most incredible lies called racism, nationalism, sexism, age-ism and materialism fade in comparison. The Devil's campaign of lies would be a mega-giga-super-duper advertising campaign about "The One and Only" made up of a million trillion pop songs and music videos and TV series and movies and women's magazines and books and novels, backed by the fashion and cosmetic industries — all broadcasting non-stop day and night the Devil's pack of lies about relationships....

Now I wonder how the Devil's brilliant plan turned out...?

©2010, 2012 by Tim Ray. All Rights Reserved.
Reprinted with permission of the publisher,
Findhorn Press. www.findhornpress.com

This article was adapted with permission from the book:

101 Relationship Myths: How to Stop Them from Sabotaging Your Happiness
by Tim Ray.

Challenging many common delusions about love, this straight-talking, humorous guide takes a closer look at the insanity of modern-day relationships. The handbook uses simple “mythbusting” techniques for increasing self-awareness and avoiding misguided ideas. Guaranteed to provide greater clarity and contentment between any two people, this reference provides provocative — and much-needed — social commentary in a humorous fashion.

For more info and /or to order this book on Amazon.

About the Author

Tim Ray is a popular relationship columnist and blogger, and has appeared in relationship programs on TV, been a guest lecturer at couples’ therapy school, and has a private counselling practice. He calls his work “Getting Real” and by this he means how to live a happy life by waking up to the nature of reality and the way the mind works. "Mythbusting" is an important part of this process in which Tim helps people identify and investigate the thoughts and beliefs that make them unhappy. Tim works closely with his mother Barbara Berger and together they have shared their "Getting Real" observations and tools in Denmark and other countries for many years. Visit their website: www.beamteam.com