InnerSelf

New Attitudes - New Possibilities

Parenting Attitudes

Parenting Attitudes

Bonding of Mother and Child

Joseph Chilton Pearceby Joseph Chilton Pearce.   Bonding gives an intuitive, extrasensory kind of relationship between mother and child. Bonding is a felt process, not available to discursive thought, language, or intellect. It is a communion that bypasses our ordinary reasoning mind. The mother senses the infant's need to evacuate the same way she recognizes her own bodily needs, but the communion of bonding goes beyond just physical processes.

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Fear of the Dark

Sonia Choquette Ph.D.

by Sonia Choquette. A common childhood fear is fear of the dark. Many children become terrified of the dark and can't go to sleep in a darkened room alone, convinced the "bogeyman" or some other night creature is waiting in the shadows to get them. I had a client whose son was terrified...

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Dissolving Power Struggles

Samuel Osherson, Ph.D.

by Samuel Osherson, Ph.D.

We all know that it's best to avoid getting into control struggles with our kids -- battles over going to bed on time, cleaning up rooms, getting homework done, completing college applications when they're due. Yet power struggles are not so easy to avoid. What parent doesn't at times feel locked in a battle in which no one wins and no one surrenders?

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Are You a Depressed Parent

Richard O'Connor, Ph.D. by Richard O'Connor, Ph.D. The number of children on Ritalin is rising at a truly alarming rate. At the same time, the incidence of clinical depression among adults -- including parents -- is almost epidemic, and continues to rise. We need to understand the connection between...

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Cross My Heart

 Full Esteem Ahead by Diane & Julia Loomans.by Julia Loomans.

When I was little, my mom and I used to have a lot of fun turning old ideas around and changing the meaning into something we enjoyed more. When we heard someone say, "I'm going to kill two birds with one stone," we changed it to "I'm going to feed two birds with one seed!

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Broken Parents Broken Children

Francesca Cappucci Fordyceby Francesca Cappucci Fordyce.

When parents have a baby, they unwittingly have to deal with their own brittle past. At every new stage, memories sneak up. A parent recalls what happened when they were that age. Just as we cope with unfulfilled expectations, the most effective way to avoid recalling childhood memories is to keep moving. There is a syndrome of "running parents", always on the go. The neurosis of running becomes a family affliction, parents insist that their children remain busy as well.

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Accept and Validate

Vimala McClure

Acceptance is the hallmark of many Eastern teachings. Author Melodie Beattie says, "Acceptance is the magic that makes change possible." You are able to make the space for change if you accept and validate what is. The opposite of acceptance and validation is judgment and denial, which make us tense up, lose our center, criticize ourselves and others, and hold impossible standards for everyone. When we are being judgmental, we invalidate ourselves and others.

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