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Home Self-Help Behavior Modification General Behavior

Blame Attacks include Criticism, Accusations, Humiliation

 

Blame Attacks include Criticism, Condemnation, Accusations, Humiliation

by Carl Alasko, Ph.D. Blame is a series of actions and reactions. They all work together to generate the Blame Syndrome. The three parts are: The Blame Attack (the initial criticism — no matter how minor); The Emotional Impact (negative feelings caused by being blamed); The Reactive Response (blame is fired back). Identifying the behavior is the first step.

Stop Hurting Yourself! Choose to Forgive

Stop Hurting Yourself! Choose to Forgive

by Rev. Daniel Chesbro.

Everyone has experienced an event that they’re sure was terrible. Then, when you think about it ten years later, you realize that if that hadn’t happened, you wouldn’t be here right now enjoying life. So how could that have been...

Commitment: A Four-Letter Word?

Commitment: A Four-Letter Word? -- article by Marie T. Russell

by Marie T. Russell. Sometimes it seems that commitment is a four-letter word. It is a word that oftentimes brings up insecurity, doubt, and fear. What is the underlying fear to our committing ourselves to an action, project, or relationship? Is it...

The Drama in Our Lives: A Wake-Up Call

The Drama in our Lives, article by Alan Sealeby Alan Seale.

We all have times in our life where we find ourselves caught in the middle of dramas or 'impossible' situations. Our first tendency mighty be to find who's to blame and/or how to fix it. However, Alan Seale suggests: "This situation has happened for a reason. It wants to tell us something — to help us clearly recognize what is not working or what wants to change or heal. The drama is a wake-up call..."

Why Wait for Heaven?

Alan Cohen, author of the article: Why Wait for Heaven?by Alan Cohen.

As Dee and I took our bulkhead seats on our flight home to Hawaii, we noticed a young newlywed couple seeking their seats in the row across the aisle from us. They were on their honeymoon. When they realized that they were assigned seats apart from each other, their countenance dropped like a five-year-old whose ice cream cone...

Abandoning Belief Rocked My World

John Ptacek, author of the article: How Abandoning Belief Rocked My World

by John Ptacek.

Believing is as automatic as walking or talking or sneezing, and about as noteworthy. There was a time when I considered my beliefs to be something more than just an assemblage of thoughts. I thought they were me. Deprived of our-ists and -isms, would we behave differently than we do now? Who would we be without our beliefs?

Blame, Shame, and Self-Responsibility

Blame, Shame, & Self-Responsibility by Lynn Woodland.by Lynn Woodland.

The more we bristle at the idea of self-responsibility, the more likely it is that we were taught at an early age to feel shame. Blame and shame go hand in hand, one giving rise to the other. They both have to do with finding fault, pointing a finger of judgment, and defining something or someone as “wrong.” For those of us who’ve been taught to feel shame, it’s...

Zucchini, Weeds, and the Mind

Zucchini, Weeds, and the Mind by Marie T. Russellby Marie T. Russell.

This year for the first time, I have planted zucchini in my garden. At first I thought people had  exaggerated... But now I have discovered something. You may check your garden in the afternoon and see some small...

Examining Your Beliefs

Deborah King, author of the article: Examining Your Beliefs

by Deborah King.

Often, our most important beliefs are unconscious. Over 90 percent of those that we currently hold we took on as kids from our parents or caregivers, school, and culture. These views run the greater part of our lives and determine if we’re going to be...

Actively Creating Peace

by Pema Chödrön.

Pema Chödrön

Suppose there were a place we could go to learn the art of peace, a sort of boot camp for spiritual warriors. Instead of spending hours and hours disciplining ourselves to defeat the enemy, we could spend hours and hours dissolving the causes of war.

Just Three Simple Rules

by Joseph R. Simonetta.

Joseph R. SimonettaMany of us are familiar with the Ten Commandments that appear in Exodus, the second book of the Bible, written some thirty-three hundred years ago. We would all agree that we have learned a few things in the last thirty-three hundred years. It may be that instead of the Ten Commandments, we require just three simple rules for living...

Becoming More Present

by John Kuypers.

John Kuypers

Twenty ways to become more present including getting enough sleep, listening to your body, and more.

Enjoying All That Is

Marie T. RussellLife can be stressful. It can and does present challenges. It also brings pleasures and laughter, as well as sadness and tears. Life is an amalgam of all of the emotions and experiences available to us. Sometimes these experiences we accept with joy, others we want to run from and hide, others just plain aggravate us or bore us 'to death'.

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