InnerSelf.com

Everyday is April Fools Day...it doesn't only occur on April 1st. Many of us are living daily the greatest April fool of all... and we are it!

We have been living our lives as a lie, pretending to be someone we're not. That is a powerful statement, yet, in many cases it is the truth. We are living OUR lives as if they belonged to someone or something else. We are doing what we were pushed into, manipulated into, cajoled into, or simply encouraged into. We dress the way someone else wants us do, we may be working in a job or career that someone else chose for us, we may even be married to someone based on their fulfilling certain "requirement" for our security.

But, you may say, "It's not my fault. I simply did what my parents, teachers, friends, etc. told me was best for me." Reflecting on our upbringing, we may feel that we were helpless. Someone else made all the decisions for us, and ours was not to question why.

Rather than go into a long debate about the past, let us instead look at our lives right now. We still do things because others expect it of us. We dress in certain ways to please husbands, wives, friends, employers, customers, etc. We follow a particular career path or job, even if we are not happy there, because we think we don't have a choice. Well... April fool! You do have a choice and you always have had one... you simply did not realize it!

Perhaps now is the time to sit down with yourself, and really delve into the realms of your sub-conscious desires. What do you really want out of life? Where do you want to be? Whom do you want to be with? What do you want to be doing? Are you working at a job you enjoy? Are you living where you would 'if' you had the choice? Are you sharing your time with people you love? Are you choosing do to things that fulfill your needs and desires? Or are you doing what you think you have to or 'should' do?

Whenever your motivation is a 'should', your actions do not stem from your preference. You are acting out of obligation either towards parents, society, or your own expectations. The crazy thing is that you may not think you have a choice. Have you trapped yourself in a cage of your own construction? And, most of all, are the bars of that cage illusionary?

There is no law, religious or otherwise, that states that humans must be miserable. That is an April fool's trick. Contrary to what some religions have taught for centuries, it is not necessary to suffer in order to get into heaven. Surprise! Heaven is accessible to us right here and now if we only step out of our self-made prison and free ourselves. We can create heaven on earth in our day to day experience, simply by reclaiming our right to freedom and happiness. It can be done slowly, little by little, if the shock of discovering your total freedom is too much to handle.

Start with little things -- follow your intuition, your inner voice, with 'insignificant' events like what to wear that day, or what foods to eat that day, or deciding what to do with your spare time. There is no rule that declares you must go out and constantly be doing things, or eat what some "expert" tells you to eat, or wear what "others" have decided is "in fashion" this year. Listen to your inner voice. What is your true desire? Maybe for you, puttering around the house fulfills a need to be alone and creative. Or maybe, going out to celebrate life with friends is what you need. Maybe you need to wear red that day, even if it doesn't match your complexion (so you've been told). For example, I grew up being told by my sister that I looked awful in red... only to discover, that I love wearing red and it works fine for me. So, all those years that I listened to her opinion, depriving myself of the pleasure of wearing a color that energizes me.

Listen to yourself. Stop listening to others. What is best for others is not necessarily best for you. You have your own path to follow. Follow the beat of your own drummer, not someone else's.

Don't play an April Fools on yourself. Love yourself enough to let yourself be free to be who you really are. Let your light shine bright within yourself and see where it leads you.

Recommended book:

A Way Out of the Trap: A Ten-Step Program for Spiritual Growth
by Nathan Rutstein.

An easy-to-follow guide for people of all faiths who want to live more fulfilling lives. A practical guide to understanding the purpose of life and how to live it.

Info/Order book

About The Author

Marie T. Russell is the founder of InnerSelf Magazine (founded 1985). She also produced and hosted a weekly South Florida radio broadcast, Inner Power, from 1992-1995 which focused on themes such as self-esteem, personal growth, and well-being. Her articles focus on transformation and reconnecting with our own inner source of joy and creativity.

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